PJ Sykes, 08:30:39 PM
Here we go! A DEADLY ADOPTION
melissa, 08:31:43 PM
And… we’re live! I am not good at doing this without Katie. Also, we haven’t started the DVR yet…
PJ Sykes, 08:33:05 PM
We are starting 30mins late, but will catch up to live TV over a few commercial breaks.
melissa, 08:33:19 PM
It’s on the beginning titles and I’m already giggling.
Is this their house? It is REALLY nice.
melissa, 08:33:49 PM
Will Ferrell as a financial guru? HAHAHAHAH.
PJ Sykes, 08:34:01 PM
Robert “Nothing is going to tear me away from my family” hmmm….
PJ Sykes, 08:34:59 PM
Slow motion screams.
melissa, 08:35:15 PM
I don’t know how they are speaking these lines without laughing.
Kristin Wiig, pregnant, just fell backwards into the water and Will Ferrell jumped in after her! I guess this baby’s not going to make it.
melissa, 08:35:48 PM
I hope Bill Hader shows up.
PJ Sykes, 08:36:08 PM
Hospital coffee, amiright?
melissa, 08:36:55 PM
I don’t watch non-Christmas Lifetime movies anymore so this is a total stretch for me.
PJ Sykes, 08:37:52 PM
It’s like the opening credits of The Shining panning over the water.
melissa, 08:38:53 PM
Will’s hair looks incredibly fake and lacquered with hairspray.
melissa, 08:39:49 PM
Oooh a diverse farmer’s market! Kristin Wiig/Sarah sells sweets there with some loser named Charlie.
melissa, 08:41:07 PM
Sarah’s 100% Organic. Charlie is the best character in this so far. I want a Charlie movie. He makes assy comments.
melissa, 08:41:49 PM
I love how Kristin Wiig keeps playing characters who bake. Maybe she really likes to eat so she forces people to write it into scripts.
melissa, 08:42:42 PM
OOOH I’m imagining Rogelio from Jane the Virgin playing Robert and it is genius. MORE ROGELIO.
PJ Sykes, 08:43:48 PM
Robert is still sad about the accident, Sarah is way over it and into organic baking.
PJ Sykes, 08:44:47 PM
Sarah has a family secret, and it’s sex.
melissa, 08:44:52 PM
Robert blames the doctor for Sarah’s miscarriage. Also their daughter is a diabetic, but Kristin Wiig bakes all the time.
I keep imagining Kristin Wiig saying lines as SNL characters.
melissa, 08:45:25 PM
The pregnant girl whose baby they may adopt looks a lot like Megan Fox, but without all the dumb tattoos.
PJ Sykes, 08:45:47 PM
I hope Wilford Brimley shows up and helps the kid with her diabetes.
melissa, 08:46:25 PM
OF COURSE her name is Bridgette. Robert can’t stop staring at her tits.
PJ Sykes, 08:46:27 PM
Pregnant lady drops family photo and it shatters… hmmm
PJ Sykes, 08:47:19 PM
Robert has a book called “Debt: It’s not just a four letter word”
melissa, 08:47:35 PM
Bridgette should know that student debt would help her get a good job and build credit when she pays her bills off at a low interest rate.
melissa, 08:48:39 PM
“If I could afford to live in a house like this…” I think we can work that out for you, Bridgette.
PJ Sykes, 08:49:13 PM
Preg lady is also over protective of children. hmmmm
PJ Sykes, 08:49:32 PM
Two seconds later, Do you want to live with us?
melissa, 08:49:55 PM
“What if this hot young girl, who happens to have read my book, stays with us?”- Robert
melissa, 08:50:42 PM
It is the saddest that they never built the pier back after Sarah fell into the water. What’s the point of living on a lake?
melissa, 08:51:44 PM
I have Sarah’s striped top in three colors. It’s J. Crew. It’s the best tee shirt in the world.
melissa, 08:52:16 PM
This Bridgette seems like a bad seed. I don’t trust this asshole.
melissa, 08:54:41 PM
Charlie likes Bridgette. Why is he such a bad judge of character?
Bitch is ALREADY ripping Sarah’s face off a picture of she and Robert.
melissa, 08:55:40 PM
Robert, you will get no peace and quiet as long as Bridgette is in your house.
PJ Sykes, 08:56:48 PM
Sarah and the kid are leaving Robert and preg lady alone in the house. The dog is off limits.
melissa, 08:57:46 PM
I feel like Robert’s book editor would be BFFs with Charlie.
PJ Sykes, 08:58:34 PM
Bridget wants sunblock, asks in sexy voice.
PJ Sykes, 08:59:44 PM
SPF 30 is that enough?
melissa, 08:59:52 PM
We have at least eight different bottles of sunscreen in our house and it is only two of us.
melissa, 09:02:25 PM
The slow pan of Bridgette laying in the sun followed by Robert’s awkward face is pure hilarity.
PJ Sykes, 09:03:02 PM
How much coffee should a pregnant lady drink? So far that is all she has had to drink lots of coffee.
PJ Sykes, 09:03:44 PM
Gay friend is trying to figure out Bridget.
melissa, 09:04:05 PM
Ohhhh now I remember how I know Bridget… she was on the reboot of 90210. She has very lovely, thick hair. I’ll bet she takes a lot of a vitamins.
PJ Sykes, 09:04:29 PM
Robert doesn’t like big motors on the lake. Is trying to make it a town law.
PJ Sykes, 09:06:57 PM
Creepy reflection of Bridget is staring a the sleeping kid.
PJ Sykes, 09:07:34 PM
Now she is pushing the kid into the road as a car comes.
melissa, 09:07:59 PM
YESSS Bridget has a crazy (ex?) boyfriend that looks like Stuart from the Love Language.
PJ Sykes, 09:08:19 PM
ExBF Duane is here. Cue evil sounding string music.
melissa, 09:08:21 PM
We know he is bad because he has lots of tattoos and the arms of his tee shirt are cut off.
melissa, 09:11:02 PM
How much do Sarah and Charlie make selling cake at the farmer’s market? Like enough to quit a mid-level state job at a university? Asking for a friend.
PJ Sykes, 09:11:57 PM
Robert is afraid of the water and blames Sarah for falling in. Says he can’t lover her the same.
melissa, 09:13:31 PM
I can’t tell if I like sassy black coffee lady or gay baking sidekick better. #ugh
PJ Sykes, 09:13:35 PM
We have met the only black person in town. She is the barista. More coffee.
melissa, 09:14:18 PM
So did Robert sleep with someone on his last book tour? His editor? Maybe Duane? Did he witness a murder?
PJ Sykes, 09:15:20 PM
She isn’t really pregnant! I knew it!
melissa, 09:15:53 PM
PJ totally called the Bridget’s-not-really-pregnant twist! Bridget, don’t trust Sully with this news!
PJ Sykes, 09:17:50 PM
Bridget and Sully are now besties with secrets.
melissa, 09:19:29 PM
OMG Bridget is Joni and Robert may have slept with her after meeting her at a club on his book tour?
PJ Sykes, 09:19:44 PM
Her name isn’t really Bridget! Flashback to his one night stand with Joni
PJ Sykes, 09:20:55 PM
I guess you can have a rock star lifestyle if you write finance books.
melissa, 09:21:03 PM
I’m going to liveblog the Full House TV movie! I hope Katie is available. That will be SO TERRIBLE.
PJ Sykes, 09:24:38 PM
Robert has been sober for a few years. He’s about to have a drink. HERE COMES FRANK THE TANK!
melissa, 09:24:46 PM
In real life, Charlie is a comedian named Bryan Safi. I’m guessing he’s friends with Kristin Wiig and/or Will Ferrell.
PJ Sykes, 09:27:15 PM
Robert cheated on Sarah with Joni on a book tour who is pretending to be Bridget who is presenting to be pregnant.
melissa, 09:28:39 PM
Bridget went from ugly 90s polyester dresses to tiny jorts and huge hoop earrings. I’m so confused.
PJ Sykes, 09:28:54 PM
Bridget is dressed like she’s in a biker gang.
PJ Sykes, 09:30:21 PM
The gay guy doesn’t know anything about the car, knows everything about the man she ran away with.
PJ Sykes, 09:31:37 PM
“Mailbox” looks a lot like Gmail. Google may want to look into that.
melissa, 09:31:56 PM
Charlie has been wearing this shirt for a week. The clothing budget on this thing is tiny.
melissa, 09:33:43 PM
DON’T HURT CHARLIE. He is just trying to save Sully.
PJ Sykes, 09:35:21 PM
What! They killed charlie!
melissa, 09:35:38 PM
OMFG THAT ASSHOLE KILLED CHARLIE. I am devastated. This movie means nothing to me anymore.
PJ Sykes, 09:36:21 PM
Montage of “missing child” flyers. Sad puppy sniffing balled up flyer.
PJ Sykes, 09:37:48 PM
I feel like we are gearing up for a boat chase. Please let there be a boat chase!
melissa, 09:37:55 PM
Is it too hard to Google Diabetes and know what this poor kid needs? It’s not fucking candy, morons.
melissa, 09:40:16 PM
Bridget, why are you boating in high-heeled boots?
PJ Sykes, 09:41:37 PM
Joni is sarcastically tapping on Sarah’s car. Now has a gun!
PJ Sykes, 09:43:14 PM
Yes! double choke hold!
melissa, 09:44:02 PM
Sadly, Sarah could not take out that bitch Bridget. She is sitting in the garage with the car running. This is no good for anyone. I hope Sully’s tummy feels better.
PJ Sykes, 09:44:05 PM
Oh no! Carbon monoxide!
PJ Sykes, 09:45:07 PM
Robert has been shot! Joni is on a roll.
melissa, 09:46:28 PM
Is everyone going to die in this thing? FalalalaLifetime movies all have happy endings. Everyone marries a prince or someone rich.
PJ Sykes, 09:48:49 PM
Joni tells Sully her dad is dead, then shoots ex bf in front of her, then tells Sully her mom is dead. I’ll bet she wishes it was just diabetes now.
PJ Sykes, 09:50:19 PM
Robert finds the strength to pick up Sarah after being shot twice… and they have a moment exactly like the water accident at the start of the movie.
PJ Sykes, 09:52:19 PM
We are now caught up with live TV.
PJ Sykes, 09:52:58 PM
How is that BF not dead after being shot in the stomach from like 4ft away?
melissa, 09:53:10 PM
We are finally caught up on the DVR! Whew. Unfortunately I am finding it hard to stay awake. I’m sorry, dear readers.
melissa, 09:54:51 PM
It is such a shame Charlie had to be killed by two of the most boring villains ever.
PJ Sykes, 09:55:48 PM
Sully is going to save the day!
melissa, 09:55:56 PM
Joni/Bridget clearly has some issues with men that she needs to work out.
PJ Sykes, 09:56:54 PM
Robert is such a good dad that he brought her insulin in the boat.
PJ Sykes, 09:59:13 PM
Sully and Robert jump off the bridge! He’s been shot twice, maybe three times now and Sully is almost passed out.
PJ Sykes, 09:59:36 PM
Yes! Sarah shot Joni/Bridget!!!
melissa, 09:59:48 PM
CHEERING FOR SARAH WITH A GUN!!! And I don’t think people should really have guns. But damn, she is a really good shot. Better than Bridget/Joni.
melissa, 10:00:41 PM
Don’t they miss Charlie??? He was Sarah’s employee for YEARS and now she’s working alone.
PJ Sykes, 10:01:05 PM
Cut to super long dance scene in the kitchen as a happy family.
melissa, 10:01:41 PM
This scene was so obviously filmed before they chose the song.
PJ Sykes, 10:01:42 PM
“inspired by a true story”
PJ Sykes, 10:02:59 PM
I wish zombie Charlie would show up or maybe just a shot of his grave.
melissa, 10:03:49 PM
Anddddd I will leave you with the best part of this movie. Good night everyone!