Smart ladies love fashion, the best and worst dressed at the 2016 Golden Globe after parties

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I like the after parties because: the big stars sometimes switch into dresses that are even better and more fun than what they wore earlier in the evening and a bunch of weird randos show up.

This is not an exhaustive post: I did not have time to go through every single Globes event while also getting this posted at an acceptable time. I also did not include men. However, there was still lots of great stuff and also totally fug shit to browse. Let’s get started!

Best Dressed

Caitriona Balfe

Based on her two really strong looks at the Globes, she is absolutely one to watch, and she deserves that status over some other, more high-profile actresses.

I love this. I also appreciate how comfy it looks. -K

Ashley Madekwe

This girl is always on point. What an adorable party dress!

This is so FUN! It’s nice to see a modern take on the polka dot. -K

Kat Graham

Where did the kooky go, Kat? I’m ok that she went straight up fabulous for the parties–this is so cool on her!

I don’t know who Kat is (her name sounds vaguely familiar, does she normally dress bad, could she have been in Fug madness) but I really love this dress (ALSO looks comfy). -K

Jennifer Lopez

I can’t decide if I like this or the yellow one better! Oh J Lo, you magical unicorn.

JLo is a UNICORN! She is just so freaking pretty. -K

Meredith Ostrom

Hey, it’s a normal–Meredith is a producer–and she looks great!

Meredith did a great job with her accessories. GO MEREDITH! -K

Laverne Cox

I preferred her event gown, but she is really having a white moment and it looks wonderful on her. Also: perfect makeup.

I too liked her event gown better but this is great for parties. I think her clutch might be amazing. -K

Lotte Verbeek

Excellent shoe choice (that you can’t really see, sadface), lady who apparently plays Katie’s favorite character Gelly on Outlander.

I will miss Lotte on Outlander unless they figure some way to bring her back. She looks amazing in blue. -K

Serayah McNeill

As I have only seen Serayah in very little clothing, both on Empire and some awards shows where Taylor Swift brought her up as part of her “squad,” I was so happy to see her in something so bright AND fancy. Her whole head is gorgeous too.

MORE NEON PLEASE! -K 

Ali Shawkat

Wow, someone actually wearing something fun and good for dancing! Imagine that! I hope she and Ashley Madekwe danced to Prince all night.

AND MORE PLAID! -K

Jennifer Lawrence

Cuuuuuuuute. I like her hair too.

JLaw always reminds me of Malibu Barbie this is NOT a complaint it is a COMPLIMENT! -K

Kate Bosworth

Two for two for the night. Love the pants and tunic (?).

I love this look. I do have an issue with the size of the peplum, I wish it was a little smaller as it kind of makes her look super bony and like her head is too small for her body. -K

Gabrielle Union

The dress is GREAT on her. I will ignore the necklace she placed on her forehead.

I like this dress but that necklace headband makes me want to curl up in a ball and never look at fashion again. Back on a positive note Gabrielle Union does NOT age. -K

Elizabeth Rohm

Has she worn this before? I don’t care, at least it works. Sparkles!

I LOVE THIS! It’s so sparkly. I do find it scary how much she looks like Amy Poehler. -K

Stephanie Sigman

She is from NARCOS, but don’t hold that against her. This is really interesting and looks like she is wrapped in the netting.

This looks like a really fun party outfit. PLUS I LOVE PANTS! MORE FORMAL PANTS! I apologize for the shoutiness of my comments. -K

Ellie Bamber

At first glance, I liked the pattern a lot, but when I clicked through, I saw the wide straps, pockets and straight shape and I fell in love with this dress. She will play Lydia in Pride & Prejudice & Zombies so I hope she’s on the red carpet more.

I want to own this fabric. -K

Ta’Rhonda Jones

Porsha cleans up GOOD. LOOK AT THAT FACE.

GOLD CAFTAN! Truth be told if I ever went to an awards show I would wear something like this with a turban, probably fur. -K

Gillian Anderson

I love you always.

X-FILES IS ALMOST HERE! -K

Jamie King

Considering how strangely she’s been dressing lately, I will consider a dress made out of the Dum Dum Girls’ leftover tights a complete win.

HAHAHAHAHA! I like the stripes?!?!? -K

Selena Gomez

Not what I would expect from her–she loves minidresses and edgier looks–but I love the romanticism of this floaty gown.

Oh Gomez you are so lovely. -K

Grace Gealey

She is so goddamn pretty! I wish Empire would use her better.

BOOBOO KITTY LOOKS GOOD! -K

Retta

The sleeves are too much fabric, which is a shame, because the necklace, dress color and makeup are all working well here.

I love the color of this dress so much. I miss Parks & Rec. -K

Meh Dressed

BC Jean and Mark Ballas

He’s on Dancing with the Stars, she wrote “If I Were a Boy,” and they both look like they’re at a goth ballroom dance night at Club Snooooooze.

His suit jacket is badly fitted, it’s both too loose and too tight. Also is his suit made out of linen, in JANUARY?!? She looks like she got caught in a parachute. -K

Olivia Holt

This reads too prom to me, despite the bold color.

I wish it was shorter! People, it’s a party, go mini or cocktail length. -K

Erika Christensen

I dig her churchy vibes.

Umm, is she wearing satin formal overalls? I can barely stand formal jammies I will lose my shit over formal overalls. -K 

Katherine Schwarzenegger

Really ill-fitting but bonus points for not being black/lace/a nightgown/boobalicious.

I like the color. -K

Mireille Enos

The color is pretty but also makes the dress look like something you could get at LOFT. Great face though!

Her dress is boring but the face and earrings are divine. -K

Louise Roe

I hate this slightly less than what Taylor Schilling wore at the main event.

Ugh jammies. I hate this less than the formal overalls. -K

Xosha Roquemore

I love her on The Mindy Project so much that I can’t bring myself to put her in Worst Dressed. But using gold lace does not make me forget that the dress is LACE.

I’m so fucking bored with sheer lace. I do love Tamara. -K

Nathalie Emmanuel

HOLY HAIR!!! Also, this dress should be an inch or so shorter.

This is so fucking good and yet Melissa is totally right it just needs to be a tad bit shorter. -K

Kaley Cuoco

Hey boyyyyyssss… I’m SINGLE NOW!!! WOOOOOO.

This would also be good if she lost the slit and it was shorter. -K

Niecy Nash

Kind of glam… but also looks like a squirrel on her shoulder.

Ditch the fur and this would also be amazing. We have had three so close to good’s that it makes me sad. -K

Lea Michele

ZZZZZZZZ… I do like the earrings, at least? She used to wear much cuter stuff.

I like her head but everything else is blah. -K

Kourtney Kardashian

As always, Kourtney is the least-poorly dressed Kardashian.

Her head looks too big for her body. -K

Kylie Jenner

None of this is working for me except her face, but I’m feeling charitable tonight. I don’t like the two tones here and a princess skirt with a belly top is not a thing I would suggest anyone to wear, ever.

Her face looks so different that I feel like they have hired yet another Kylie. -K

Nicole Scherzinger

Nicole Scherzinger no baby no

Worst Dressed

Melissa George

Her face looks nice but she’s essentially wearing a naked, goth version of this:
Eliza-Doolittle-Pink-dress

She is totally going to go far in Fug Madness this year. -K

Tizania Rocco

PR Rando in cheap-looking stretched out dress.

If JLaw is Malibu Barbie this woman is a Big Lots knock off Barbie, whose clothes are super flammable. -K

Zoe Bell

I have faith that this beautiful woman can find a more flattering dress that is not a FLOOR-LENGTH bandage dress made from a high-waisted skirt, a bandeau top, and cap sleeves, which are all attached with questionable netting. This is one of the ugliest things I’ve seen in a long time.

This makes me so sad because I love Zoe Bell –SO FUCKING FUG. -K

Maika Monroe

From the 10,000 Villages collection.

Her shoes might be nice??? -K

Rumer Willis

Ignoring the GIGANTIC u-neck that goes down to her belly button, this gown looks like moss grown on pantyhose with Working Girl-shoulder pads.

Her make-up is also THE WORST. -K

Kelly Rohrbach

This dishwater-colored two-sided napkin is just fucking weird.

Her hair is gross. -K

Naya Rivera

I guess if you’re going to wear a hideous, boob-revealing dress made out of couch fabric, an after-party is the place to do it because it’s probably really dark.

Naya is doing a really terrible job of cosplaying JLo. -K

Jess Weixler

Repeat after me: cut outs OR peplum, NEVER BOTH!

Those shoes and that color deserves something better than THIS! -K

Dani Thorne

Catholic veil-turned-fugly party dress.

She looks like she mugged a kid about to go to her first holy communion. -K

Bellamy Young

My interest in Melly as a character (and Scandal as a show) diminished once I realized this woman cannot dress herself.

Does she have both side and under boob? -K

The Naked Randos

Darla Strokous

Are we human or are we zombies?

EAT SOMETHING –maybe a carb. -K

Masha Rudenko

This has a mock turtleneck.

See this is why I hate sheer and lace because these idiots take it too fucking far. Also it makes you look like you have moss on your privates that is NOT sexy! -K

Whitney Port

Nope, no one is paying attention to you anymore.

You know just wear your fucking La Perla underpants it this is how your going to dress. -K

I’m Going Right to Bed After This

Chloe Bennett

There’s something about this I almost like and I have no idea what it is or why.

It looks like it would be comfy. -K

Mel B

While she seems like a lovely person, my eyes are threatening to jump out of my skull if I have to look at another negligee gown.

I need another caftan. -K

Jennifer Morrison

?????

Why did the make-up artist make her look eighty? -K

WTF Dressed

Hana Hayes

The F21 version of this.

WHO??? -K

Zoe Kravitz

I would tell her we can see her nipples but she did that on purpose, right?

She really looks so much like her mother it’s scary. -K

Petra Collins

This is a joke, right??

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