Smart ladies love to ask, why can’t Hollywood find a good vehicle for Anna Faris?

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Anna Faris Just Friends

After being “discovered” as a comedienne in Lost in Translation, Anna Faris has gone on to star in a whole bunch of shitty things, while also marrying and having a kid with rad Parks and Recreation actor Chris Pratt. The bright spots of her career have (unfortunately) been early. Why hasn’t she been able to find a decent project in the past eight years?

Scary Movie 2

Technically she was in these movies first but the less said about them the better, mmhmmm.

I don’t really blame anyone for casting her in Waiting, a cable movie I can’t physically turn off when I come across it, but I do think it’s kinda terrible.

Waiting Cast

I have seen this movie twenty times & couldn’t tell you what happens.

Thankfully she was in Just Friends, my absolute favorite late-night-TV treat that I will watch every weekend, as a lunatic pop star in love with Ryan Reynolds:

Because being the crazy lady can only get you so far, she also starred in the very cute The House Bunny, where she played a former playmate who became the house mother for a sorority full of weirdos (Kat Dennings, Emma Stone, Kat McPhee and others are also genius in this movie):

This was probably her biggest hit but I think it also ended up hurting her, since people saw her as a dumb, sexy girl even though she is CLEARLY so much more than that. Especially when actresses get older, it is difficult for them to get decent work after they have been branded as a hot girl.

What's Your Number

Her character’s name is Ally Darling. GAG!

Since they didn’t know what to do with Anna anymore, she was cast in What’s Your Number? a crappy sexist rom com with Chris Evans, who will act in anything.  He is my top pick for Fifty Shades of Grey because he won’t say no. In fact, he would probably be super into it. Just ask him.

While I think she did a good job with the dreck she was given, this kind of shit was covered on Sex and the City ten years ago. And if you believe anything that would be in Cosmo, you are an idiot. No one thinks like that anymore. No one cares what your number is; and if they do, they are probably uptight assholes. Also SHE PRODUCED THIS CRAP. Please meet with your husband’s coworker Amy so she can inspire you not to take shite rom coms.

Katie and I watched Take Me Home Tonight a few months ago and it was completely devoid of charm and/or humor despite its excellent cast.

Take Me Home Tonight Poster

More like “most mediocre night ever.”

When I heard Anna  was going to be on a TV show I was so excited. FINALLY! Something weird and smart like 30 Rock where she can show everyone how amazing she is.

Welp. Sitcoms usually get funnier, right?

Produced by Chuck Lorre (Two & a Half Men, The Big Bang Theory, Mike & Molly), Mom might bring her newfound success, which I guess is what she probably wants, but being in a watered down Nurse Jackie, even if Allison EFFING Janney does play her mom, does not perfectly suit her skills.

Some of the best recent TV comediennes (Mindy Kaling & Tina Fey), looked around, saw nothing available to them and CREATED their own fucking shows. If something good comes out of Mom, it’s that Anna Faris will soon pull enough weight that she will find her own Veep or Parks and Rec. I will even be satisfied with an Anna version of Weeds. Just something that isn’t tangentially related to Charlie Sheen. She deserves it.

One Comment

  1. Love Anna! I do agree with you expect with “What’s Your Number?”
    I enjoyed the movie. She also was a producer on the movie. I found it pretty funny.
    I hope to whatever god that Evans does not choose to be in Shade of Grey. Can’t stand the book and I have been a fan of Evans’ for a long time. I just hope he says no.

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