Smart ladies love movies, the week in trailers, May 26, 2014

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Movie Trailer Mondays

Kingsman
Each week I review movie trailers that came out the previous week or for movies that are about to premiere. Some of these movies I am excited about, some I am mildly curious about, and the rest I make fun of!

Notable movies coming out this week

A Million Ways to Die in the West

This movie looks both funny and offensive which is typical for Seth MacFarlane so if you are into The Family Guy and you enjoyed Ted this is the film for you. [I secretly want to see this, though it looks like it would make me dumber. -M]

The Angriest Man in Brooklyn, is out onDemand and for Rent

I think I would watch a TV show starring Melissa Leo and Robin Williams as a really angry, boozy couple who hate each other but also deeply love one another on HBO, not that this is that movie but that if HBO decided to make that TV show they can hire me. Also Tilda Swinton would be in it either as Melissa Leo’s younger boozier sister or Robin Williams ball-busting boss, I’ll let Melissa make the final decision on that one. OH they have one son played by Josh Wolk because he and Robin Williams had such good chemistry on the recently cancelled The Crazy Ones. [SWINTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There’s lots of yelling in this, so much that I probably could not sit through the movie, but bonus: Peter Dinklage. He is always welcome in my life. -M]

Movies I can’t wait to see in an ACTUAL theater

Happy Christmas, July 25, 2014

I’m super excited about this indie starring Anna Kendrick who goes a little off the bend and moves in with her brother’s family. [This is going to be on demand before its in theaters, yay! I am so glad Melanie Lynskey is using her real accent! Also: my girlfriend Lena Dunham in a supporting role! Happy Christmas looks great all around. -M]

Life of Crime, August 29, 2014

John Hawkes and Yasiin Bey star in this sorta prequel to Tarantino’s Jackie Brown. Everyone in the trailer looks pretty awesome and I love dark comedies, especially ones in the “heist-gone-wrong” genre. [RIP ELMORE LEONARD. This is one of my favorite genres of movie, and EVERYONE is in it, like Tim Robbins, Will Forte, crazy Jennifer Aniston (the BEST Jennifer Aniston) and Bobby from Sons of Anarchy. Fun for all! -M]

I won’t go to an ACTUAL theater but will pay for it on Amazon

Kingsman: The Secret Service, October 24, 2014

Colin Firth in nerdy black glasses and fancy suit will make me watch anything, which is why I have watch Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy about a million times, this movie looks like it will make a whole lot more sense. [I wish there were more ladies in this, but what could I have really expected from a movie about the British CIA? It looks like Matthew Vaughn did this instead of the recent X Men movie and that might have been a good decision. This will either bomb or sell millions of tickets here. -M]

Foxcatcher, November 14, 2014

Channing Tatum is supposed to be really great in this movie but I had a hard time getting over the very actorly accents and weird facial make-up of both him and Steve Carrell. [Meh I don’t know, it seems like Steve Carrell is trying too hard. The first Oscar bait trailer for 2015?? -M]

You would have to PAY me to see it in an ACTUAL theater

The Human Race, June 13, 2014

Horror movie in which a group of people must run on a sidewalk until everyone dies except for the last one. If this shit can get made then my Robin Williams/Melissa Leo TV show should be an easy sell. [Who thought of this?? I think my favorite part in the trailer is when someone said, “DIE ALREADY!” Behold, the best imdb photo EVER courtesy of Luke Y. Thompson, who plays “Orange Vest.” -M]

Luke Thompson The Human Race

Gif is from lawyerupasshole.

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