January 11, 2016
by katie
2 Comments

Smart ladies love fashion, Katie’s best and worst dressed at the 2016 Golden Globes

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think there was too much swearing on the Globes last night and mainly this is because I was drinking and it made me think my TV was broken and/or I had gone deaf. I’m really thankful for all of the Mozart in the Jungle love because I need that show to have a third season.

The ABSOLUTE Hollywood Goddess

Jennifer Lopez

BOW DOWN TO THE QUEEN BITCHES! This is so good. It’s sexy but not naked. The color is beautiful. Her hair and make-up is divine. And don’t even get me started on the jewelry.

My Absolute FAVES

Jaimie Alexander

There is nothing I love more than a modern cut ballgown, this one had the added bonus of a pattern! She also has lovely hair and make-up and the jewelry was AMAZING.

Portia Doubleday

Portia Doubleday is very good in Mr. Robot and she doesn’t get a lot of the praise the MEN get. Her role is kind of thankless, that of daughter of victim/best friend of the lead/potential love interest, so it’s nice that she kind of rises above all of those tropes. Her gown is AMAZING! So much sparkle and the cut is perfect. I even think she is pulling off the subtle make-up.

Rachel McAdams

Melissa knew I would love this dress and she was right it is AMAZING. I am also super pleased with the hair and make-up. I wish True Detective had been worth Rachel’s talent–at least Spotlight was.

Absolute Best Dressed Male

David Oyelowo

This suit looked more purple on TV but I don’t really give a fig if it’s blue or purple, it’s just so fun. Also his shoes are sparkled AND the cut is perfect.

The Best of the Rest

Amy Adams

Amy Adams is such a stunner and I wish she was the star of Joy and not Jennifer Lawrence. I mean Amy Adams can do everything JLaw can do AND SING AND DANCE! I’m still kind of pissed JLaw won a fucking Globe over Amy Schumer. Anywho Amy Adams looks fab.

Uzo Aduba

I love Uzo’s style and how different she looks at every awards show. This black gown is so flattering and I love me a 3/4 sleeve. Her hair and smile are also both on point.

Malin Akerman

I am a sucker for a gown with a peplum and I really love the color of this dress. I also like the lace, which is just weird, as I usually don’t like lace but this is so delicate and pretty I can’t help it.

Melissa Benoist

Melissa and I both wish her hair was different. I think it would have looked great in a loose pony. What I do love and why it’s in this category is the pattern and cut. I also think her shoe choice was perfect.

Laverne Cox

Laverne Cox is so glamorous. She also makes great choices in accessories and hair/make-up. I love the green accents–they look so lovely with this white gown.

Viola Davis

Viola looks amazing in this sparkly navy gown. I love the detail in the embroidery. She is so beautiful.

Jenna Dewan-Tatum

I am obsessed with Jenna’s version of Ginuwine’s “Pony” from Magic Mike on Lip Sink Battle. We here at SLLS are also obsessed with her beauty and talent (she was good in 10 Years).

Joanne Froggatt

The illusion netting is not my fave but the color, fit, hair, accessories, and make-up far outweigh the blah netting.

Eva Green

Eva looks so lovely in this gold gown with those red lips. Her hair looked a little like fluff, though, in some pictures.

Taraji P. Henson

There were a million of these white gowns with capes (okay, there were three, but that is a lot) and I think Taraji wore hers with class and sophistication. And I’m happy she won, even though Empire has gotten kind of bad, Cookie is still a gem.

Regina King

CAPE! I’m so in love with all the capes. I am also so in love with all of the sequins. So much sparkle at the Globes. Regina King better win all the awards for The Leftovers. Also go watch The Leftovers on HBO.

Lola Kirke

GO MOZART IN THE JUNGLE! I am so glad this won 2 awards. Lola Kirke is such a good actress and I think this is very flattering. I love that she paired this mustard yellow gown with red jewels so PRETTY.

Eva Longoria

Eva loves this silhouette but I think this is the first time I have loved her in it. I love this delicate gown and that embroidery makes me drool.

Gina Rodriguez

This is how a ballgown should fit. The skirt should just skim the flor and the bust shouldn’t look like the wearer has to hike it up all night. I am so impressed with the tailoring here–it’s so perfect. She also has such a great face.

The Rest of the Hot Dudes

Oscar Isaac

SO HOT!

Michael B. Jordan

So DAPPER!

Rami Malek

This could be a tad taken in but the hem is good and he is very attractive. I also LOVED Mr. Robot and though I was happy Jon Hamm won the Globe I also would have been thrilled had Rami had won.

The Alan Cumming Award for Awesomeness in Maleness

Denis O’Hare

Denis out Alan Cumming’ed Alan Cumming in Alan Cumming’s award (I hope that made you smile). I love Dennis O’Hare he is an amazing actor and he has such a joie de vivre on the red carpet.

The Keira Knightly Award for Majestically Twee OR The Best in Black

That’s right I have 3 ladies in the Keira Knightly Award but that’s cause these black dresses were so interesting and DRAMATIC!.

Caitriona Balfe

Yes I do love Outlander a lot but I also think Caitriona has an interesting and unique style and I think the daintiness of this is fabulous. I also love her face.

Emilia Clarke

This dress is so dramatic and regal. It’s not something I would normally love but I do love it. I think I am a sucker for a cape. I also like her make-up.

Kirsten Dunst

Kiki was ROBBED by stupid fucking Lady Gaga and that is all I can say on that. As for her gown its delicate, gothy, and a tad bit TWEE. Her make-up, hait, and accessories are also ABFAB.

The Okay

Patricia Arquette

PACKAGED BOOBS! BOUQUET OF BOOBS! BOWED BOOBS!

Jennifer Jason Leigh

I like the color and the concept of the cut (though it needed to be better fitted to her bust) but I just wish her face wasn’t so blah.

Michaela Watkins

The color is so great but the fit, make-up, and hair are just BLAH.

Worst

Damian Lewis

That jacket is too small and those pants look like they were made from a very cheap fabric. This is just bad. DO BETTER, DUDES!

January 11, 2016
by melissa
5 Comments

Smart ladies love fashion, Melissa’s best and worst dressed at the 2016 Golden Globes

Another awards show, another two awards that go to someone that is NOT Mark Rylance. At least Rebecca Bloom/Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Mr. Robot, and Mozart in the Jungle got some awards that will hopefully boost their numbers and assure they continue for a few more seasons.

As usual, Katie’s recap will post in an hour, and I hope to have the after-party post up tomorrow because we have so much to talk about!

Best Dressed

When I saw this, I immediately texted Katie, “I GOT VIKANDER!!” She out-Mara-ed a Mara. My favorite of the night.

You can have your Helen Mirren, I will take Judith Light. She is classy and risk-taking all at once.

While I don’t love the flower thing on her left shoulder, this black and yellow Marc Jacobs is stunning on Maggie Gyllenhaal. This sparkled on TV too! And she always does right with the lipstick.

I feel like Cate Blanchett’s gown is going to be divisive (it’s a little fussy from the back), but I love the vintage softness of this and her great updo.

Katie hates Kate Bosworth so much but I think she has innate fashion sense. The pattern on the top of this sequin gown is stunning, and the tightly pulled back hair was a great choice.

Jane Fonda doesn’t give a fuck what you think, she will wear white flamenco ruffles/Spanish-style roof tiles over her tits.

I cannot get over how gorgeous this color is and how wonderful it looks on Queen Latifah.

Another beautiful color, this time on Olivia Wilde. The necklace is also stunning, and I love that although she didn’t put her hair up, it still looks clean and appropriate for the event.

There is nothing exciting about Sophia Bush’s black Narciso Rodriguez gown, but I think she is doing Hollywood glam better than anyone else. Also, apparently she is not just a former CW star and red carpet maven–she’s also on those Chicago shows! Mazel Tov! I’m sorry I don’t pay attention to Dick Wolf’s career.

Natalie Dormer just makes really interesting choices.

I don’t love the waist of America Ferrara’s dress but the color is fab on her and she looks overall quite beautiful. Reminder to watch her in Superstore, which is actually kind of cute!

I don’t know who invited Olivia Palermo but this is exactly the kind of unusual, colorful frock that I like to see shake things up.

Seriously, this is the best Jennifer Lawrence has looked in a while, even with the unneccessary cut outs.

I like Saoirse Ronan’s simple Greek-inspired gown. More importantly, I love her accent and I could listen to her talk for days.

Zoe Kazan’s blunt bob is fantastic and I enjoy the etherealness of her dress. Also, her and Paul Dano look so uncomfortable. God bless.

And here’s an example of a magnificently fitted dress that matches the wearer perfectly. Jada Pinkett-Smith is rocking it.

The simplicity of Amy Landecker’s gown is lovely–my minor quip is that I wish her shoes were gold.

Positives: Melissa McCarthy’s hair, makeup and shoes. Negatives: THAT FABRIC. It looked less horrible on TV.

She’s beauty and she’s grace, she’s Miss United States… just kidding, Corinne Foxx was Miss Golden Globes and she looks like a modern princess. I adore her makeup.

Most Disappointing

Yes, this IS Rooney Mara. I know. But if dinged Amanda Peet for her toilet paper dress, I had to ding Rooney for hers. A rare disappointment from my favorite red carpet queen.

I have loved Brie Larson for a long time, especially her funky red carpet style. She apparently has a new stylist, who chose this nice Calvin Klein number that is sadly ruined by boring hair and horrible golden makeup. I do like this though. A LOT.

I am just not as excited by Emmy Rossum’s red column dress as I am by her lipstick and necklace. She is usually much better.

Meh Dressed

I am so confused by Taylor Schilling’s sexy pajamas. At least she was comfortable.

Carly Chaiken played one of my fave sitcom characters–Darla on Suburgatory–so I am slightly disappointed she chose to look like a sad fish at this important awards show.

I will rep hard for Casual and Tara Lynne Barr’s performance, but she’s 22 and is dressed like Sarah Hyland from three years ago. Maybe Sarah can lend Tara her new stylist.

This is pretty good for Amy Schumer, though I think it’s a bit dated, but I never like her makeup. It’s too bronzey all over and no contrast.

I didn’t know Calista Flockhart had this kind of elegance in her–I remember most of her gowns as being bland and dated–but her sad, floppy hair lets down this look.

LIPSTICK, PLEASE. And Maura Tierney’s hair is kind of weird.

Julianne Moore looks great, but I am just bored of gowns like this on her. She can do better.

Lady Gaga’s red carpet posing is so annoying–she clearly needs everyone to see BOTH of her arm parties. If she’s going to do this snoozy old school gown, at least this one has a cool detail at the waist. Also, her makeup is flawless.

Leslie Mann usually does such a good job, and I like this from the waist down (the beading is gorgeous). But the billowy top and all the derp faces she made while posing (was she drunk/high???) were NO GOOD.

Worst Dressed

The good news: Amanda Peet did not forget her lipstick. The bad news: she also brought a whole roll of toilet paper.

While Kate Hudson totally has the body for this “dress,” the bandeau top is more appropriate for the MTV Awards and did that short scarf-necklace really need to come back?

This is not much of a departure from what Kate Winslet normally wears except it’s even more matronly.

To say nothing of the wig, Katy Perry should have sized up and have the gown refitted. It also needed a little something extra, like this.

December 31, 2015
by melissa
0 comments

Smart ladies love lists, Melissa’s best and worst TV in 2015

Last week, Katie posted her list of TV superlatives, and today it’s my turn. Even though we watch a lot of the same shows, I will try to pick some new ones (or at least find something new to say).

My favorite shows this year included Fargo, Better Call Saul, and the final season of Mad Men (SOBSSSSSS!!). Mostly I’m not going to talk about those, because I’ve done it enough and it would also be fucking boring. So let’s get to the stupid awards.

 

Most Likely to Make Me Spit Beer All Over My Coffee Table on a Friday Night

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I only watch Billy on the Street alone and while intoxicated. It is funnier that way. I am a very loud laugher and PJ could probably hear me, even with headphones on. I guess truTV has more money than fuse because this season has even bigger celebrities and he’s doing even crazier stunts, like fly a Rooney Mara balloon in a staged Thanksgiving Day parade co-hosted by Katie Couric.

Most Hilarious Bit Character

Thom (Cornelius Peter) leads a focus group on Silicon Valley. Overtime he reels off the list of participants, I die.

Most Underrated Performances

Alison Wright (Martha), The Americans

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Hypothesis: Martha is the hippest character on The Americans. They made her seem so lonely at first, but she has an awesome apartment filled with mid century furniture and smartly questions Clark’s (Phillip’s) actions. But her redemption would not be possible without Wright’s performance–she could have easily played the “clueless secretary” with Martha, but you can see in her eyes that there is more going on.

Michaela Watkins (Valerie), Casual

It’s funny to me, that in this age of praising great comedic performances by women, that Michaela Watkins flies under the radar. She is fantastic in every single thing she’s in (RIP Trophy Wife), especially hulu’s Casual (nominated for a Golden Globe! It’s good!), where she plays a recently divorced psychologist who moves into her brother’s house with her smartass teenage daughter.

Everyone in Orange is the New Black that’s not Uzo Aduba

She’s wonderful, but she has won two Emmys. This season, Taylor Schilling (Piper) brought the funny (finally) and gave one of my favorite speeches ever to her network of black market panty-wearers. Adrienne Moore (Black Cindy) went on a beautiful, emotional journey when she converted to Judaism. Kimiko Glenn (Soso) had a great arc where she explored political activism and became very lonely before finally being accepted by another group. And Pablo Schreiber deserves a guest actor Emmy for making Pornstache both loathsome and sympathetic. I love the supporting actors enough on this show to be able to ignore all the Stella or Alex nonsense.

Bill Hader, Documentary Now!

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This show has not gotten its due–maybe because it’s on IFC or was released in the summer or stars Fred Armisen, who people are tired of. But Hader, man. He’s other level.

Mary Steenburgen, every show you watch (Justified/Orange is the New Black/Last Man on Earth/7 Days in Hell/Togetherness)

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I think Mary Steenburgen is a robot. A very funny robot, but how else does she have time to star in everything and give such varied and wonderful performances? So she played a sassy mob boss, Pornstache’s mom who had some WONDERFUL scenes with Dascha Polanko, an oft-drunk chef stuck with two Phil Millers, the mother of a tennis pro, and a truly weird hippie. All of those in ONE YEAR and I cannot pick a favorite performance.

Jonathan Tucker, Justified

I hadn’t heard of this actor before he played Boon on the final season of one of my favorite shows but he brought a steely-eyed intensity that none of the Raylan Givens’ foes had ever had. Tucker played it so we felt Boon could do anything at any time, even kill our hero.

Favorite Performance on a Show I Quit Watching

Ben Mendelsohn, Bloodline & Mark Rylance, Wolf Hall

I wish I could have finished either of these shows, but zzzzzzzzz… they were both magnetic and amazing and deserving of all the awards in the few hours I spent with them.

Most Contemporary

Master of None

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Aziz Ansari’s comedy has always included elements of technology, food, and music–all things that he is passionate about. I am so thankful that he brought those things, as well as fascinating takes on gender, parenting and other topics, to Master of None.

Least Contemporary

Scream Queens

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To borrow a phrase Ryan Murphy would actually use, everything about Scream Queens is soooo five years ago. Sure, there are a ton of pop culture references (though honestly, Difficult People does it better), but the having a character be racist/sexist/ableist/etc as a way to poke fun at those who are? It should be done really fucking well, or risk being seen as outdated, which, sadly, Murphy’s work totally is. He seems out of touch with the conversation happening every day on Twitter, on sites like The Atlantic, or even in real life. Satire is tough, and Murphy does not have the skills to pull it off.

Best Voiceover

Rami Malek, Mr. Robot

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Anthony Mendez on Jane the Virgin, well, he’s been nominated for an Emmy, so he’s old news. I’m really interested in what Mr. Robot is doing with narration, which is done from the point of view of the main character Elliot (Rami Malek). As an unreliable narrator with mental illness, Elliot adds another layer to the story: is this really happening? Can we even TRUST Elliot?

Worst Voiceover

Boyd Holbrook, Narcos

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Narcos is not exactly the buzziest new show, and for good reason: lead white person Steve Murphy (Boyd Holbrook) shares every singles detail of the plotline in the narration. TELLING and not showing. Also, having the narration go through a person that is NOT Pablo Escobar just puts us further away from the most fascinating character on the show.

Best Lipstick

Hayley Atwell, Agent Carter

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This is kind of a bullshit category so I could talk about this show, which I absolutely loved. I lived in fear of Agent Carter being another Ben & Kate, cancelled after one glorious season where it burned so bright. But we get another season, which starts next month! I hope Ms. Atwell keeps the lip color, even as the show moves to L.A.

Best Banter

Tommy and Tuppence, Agatha Christie’s Partners in Crime

Tommy and Tuppence are Nick and Nora in more fun hats (let’s face it, Tuppence could also win Best Lipstick). Runners up: Sidney and Geordie from Grantchester, who argue over beers in the pub.

Worst Banter

Adam and Blake, The Voice

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I really hope that everyone in America is tired of the repetitive, dried-up barbs that Adam Levine and Blake Shelton barely toss at each other on The Voice.

Best Used 80s Icon

Bernadette Peters, Mozart in the Jungle

How wonderful is Bernadette Peters on this show?? I love that she is introduced as the enemy (she’s the president), the red tape affecting the benefits of the symphony employees. But after the sixth episode, she becomes so sympathetic–she’s dealing with some shit too–and she is just as passionate about art as the strange conductor Rodrigo. The second season dropped yesterday, so you can watch her in 20 glorious episodes RIGHT NOW on Amazon Prime!

Worst Used 80s Icon

Carol Kane, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

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Carol Kane is wacky and cute, but she is a strange choice for the landlord -I don’t feel her energy is being harnessed well enough. She doesn’t quite fit with the rest of the cast, who really need someone to balance out all their issues.

Least Disappointing AKA I Knew What I Was Getting Into, Yet I Still Watched

True Detective Season 2

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When I reflected back on season one, I remember three things: the friendship between Rusty and Marty, the direction, and the horrible treatment of women. The mystery was dumb and the hype surrounding the show was insane. Season two included a philosophical Vince Vaughn (generally, he could not pull it off), a romance no one cared about, the death of every single lead character except 1.5 (Kelly Reilly was mostly tertiary), and a mystery so convoluted that even the smartest TV writer had trouble explaining it.

Most Disappointing

X Factor UK

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I was so excited about this season but all my faves were sent home early, and the three finalists were as follows: a girl that was pimped to the high heavens despite having no personality, a typical white male oversinger who favors soul and shit that was released 30 years ago, and a super fun duo who are not great singers but I could see them as huge international one hit wonders. Still, YAWN.