So last night’s episode of American Idol (theme: “home”) was… not good. If I wanted to hear some shitty songs, I would have watched a rerun from five years ago instead of the new improved Idol. [Also why did Idol not FORCE one to the kids to sing “Home” by American Idol winner Phillip Phillips who will be performing tomorrow night –it’s called SYNERGY Fox executives! -K]
Stuff My Husband Says
“Jesus Christ are those girls being murdered it sounds like a dungeon in there.” [I think they are super into Sam Woolf. Go home, screeching tweens.]
“I hope they sing that song ‘Home.’ ‘You know, the whistling did not do it for me. It was kind of pitchy’.” [PJ also wants synergy! -K]
On Jena, dressed like 1992: “This is the worst Soundgarden cover I’ve ever heard.” [HAHAHAH! -K]
Me:”I wonder what KT Tunstall is doing now.”
PJ:”I think she’s an optometrist.”
Me: [blank stare]
PJ: “You know, suddenly I see!”
After Alex said his pick was “I Don’t Want to Be”: “That town hates you now.”
On Jess’ song choice: “Oh Dido, the girl from England.”
On Dexter: “This guys going to be an Alabama star, when he goes back and tours all the bars down there.”
On Caleb’s performance of Rush: “The drummer’s like ‘FINALLY!’…[performance ends] And thousands of kids go out and buy a Rush album. He is CLEARLY the winner. This is so dumb…[then goes into tirade about how the judges couldn’t really find anything wrong with Caleb because it was perfect].” [PJ’s love of Caleb, just like Dave Holmes’ love of Ben makes me like these losers just a tad bit more –a skosh more if you will. -K]
“‘Drops of Jupiter?’ Way to bring everyone down after the Rush concert.”
On MK: “This made me hate San Francisco. I will think of how much I hate it, next time I’m in San Francisco eating sourdough bread.”
I will say he was a trooper this week especially since the whole time I was talking about how worried I was that Majesty was going to sing “Fix You.”
Dexter’s backwards trucker cap. It was also right above a mole on his forehead that kept moving. [I thought he wanted to improve on his styling. Dexter, I love you despite myself but this week you made it hard! -K]
Worst Song Choice Ever
I have no patience for this song, even when it’s sung by my favorite Idol contestant in history. [It’s so creepy when you actually listen to the words. PLUS Chris Martin isn’t hot enough to fix me and is a waste of a British accent. -K]
Second Worst Song Choice Ever
If your song choice is the theme song to One Tree Hill, it’s safe to say you should find something else. [The guy from One Tree Hill, the dad, is the worst actor I have even seen on TV. He makes Sendhil Ramamurthy look good and that is saying something. -K]
Best Song Choice
I still think Sam is just okay, dawg and could use those years at Berklee to mature, but he had the good sense to sing a song no one had heard of. And none of the judges even mentioned that! [He also looked less scared because he was wearing that adorable hat. I find that I want to hug Sam (maternally as he is a timid child) and tell him that the producers of Idol won’t behead him if he sings bad. -K]
Katie and I really wanted Harry’s sweater. [Harry got booed a lot but he is just trying to make everyone be the best that they can be! -K]
Best cheering sections
CJs mom and girlfriend, who are there every week! MKs moms were replaced by a boring aunt and uncle so they lose. [Incidentally MK has four moms which is adorable she also has a gaggle of siblings and the whole family is adorable but Melissa was correct her aunt and uncle weren’t nearly as interesting as the rest of the fam. Bring back the moms MK! -K]
The kaleidoscopic San Francisco neighborhoods behind MK. [I’m seriously concerned about the kids today and trucker hats. MK, Dexter, and Ben all wear them and I want to burn the lot of them! -K]
You thought I was going to say Slapout, right? I love Asheville, where Caleb is from, so so much.
DUH. Her earrings were mesmerizing too. [We spend at least 5 minutes of every Idol night discussing JLo and her AWESOMENESS! -K]
There were so many duds and all my favorites bombed. But at least Jena danced a little!
[Melissa, I can’t believe you forgot Emily dancing and singing to JLo? Poor Emily she is so forgettable. We did vote for her though because she was in the bottom of the live voting and we felt bad for her.-K] I wouldn’t say I forgot her, Katie. Jena has a better voice and in the light of day, Emily did not rock this performance.
All screencaps by me. Gifs from americanidol.