Smart ladies love dumb TV, BATB recap, Cold Case

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Previously on BatB, Cat hit Mohinder in the face. This is all you need to know. Again, Cat hit Mohinder in the face. What? You missed it. Well then it’s very convenient that I have this fun gif.

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SEE! Cat hit him in the face! IN. THE. FACE.

The episode starts with Cat on her way to her apartment to meet Vincent but she’s being tailed by members of the precinct. Tess kind of, but not really, helps her evade the tail. When she shows up she is SURPRISED by Heather (her sister who moved to Miami, this is for M and for any of you who totally forgot Cat had a sister which is totally cool cause Heather was like peace out in episode 1 of this season). [Wasn’t she like competition for Vincent? Or was that the BFF? This show needs to stay consistent with its female characters. Mostly for my benefit. -M] She then makes up a terrible lie about laundry drying on the roof (in February/March) so that she can meet Vincent. They joke about how this is just like old times –I wish this show was like old times. Heather is apparently engaged (she also has a darling haircut, it’s a bob with bangs) but because Cat is an asshole who is continually caught up in some sort of shenanigan, Heather can’t tell her before Cat has to go to the precinct 9-1-1!

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Cat walks into the precinct and everyone is giving her the “you’ve been naughty stare.” The captain calls her into his office to join Tess and Mohinder. The Captain asks her if she is hiding Vincent Keller, she denies it. Mo says they are lying and demands the Captain suspend them (I’m NOT going to point out that this is NOT his job and that they have absolutely no evidence that Cat and Tess have been aiding Vincent, except for the surveillance footage last week of Vincent and Cat NOT Tess. ALSO I’m fairly sure the NYPD has a union and that the union rep has to be present or consulted before suspending anybody. NOPE not going to point that out because that’s WAY too logical and I need to trust that the writers have this show under control –HAHAHAHAHAHAH). [Katie, you need to stop looking at this show logically. From an HR standpoint alone, there is so much fucked up shit going on in this precinct that the employee relations bit would take months to sort out. -M]

The Captain asks for their badges and guns. Poor Tess, is the only person on this show who continually tries to do her job (JT I guess still teaches but it’s been a while since we heard about his work) AND deal with all this crazy shit and she gets suspended because Mohinder is the worst. [JT TEACHES? I thought he was just their computer lackey. I have missed so much. -M]

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Cat and Vincent meet in Central Park and come up with a plan to put Mo on the defensive by finding something in his past as a beast that he did that was awful. I’m fairly sure he killed a bunch of people and that Evan totally had his DNA on file. I think that Cat hid that evidence but didn’t dispose of it so this should be easy BUT nobody remembers Evan. Evan ALSO had boundary issues and kept trying to SAVE Cat. Unlike Mohinder who needs a padded room and a sedative, Evan wasn’t crazy, he just needed a course in Women’s Studies 101. Anywho, Cat is sending Tess to deal with Heather so she can make-out with Vincent and dig shit up on Mohinder. This better NOT be a JT free episode.

Mohinder demands that the captain tighten the noose around Cat by bugging her phone and putting a tracker on her car. The Captain is starting to suspect that Mo is kind of off the rails. Just as Mo ends his terse conversation with the Captain, Heather shows up to ask him where Cat is. He tells her that Cat isn’t there and that she needs to talk to Cat about WHY. [Dude, butt the fuck out. The personal problems between these sisters are NOT YOUR BUSINESS. -M] Heather is confused but does tell Mo that she will call him when she finds her sister. OH now I remember why Heather sucks, she isn’t in the Scooby gang so she always fucks up the plan.

Vincent is at the gentleman’s club because JT is in Boston (BOO!) and therefore the police have pulled surveillance (because a fugitive wouldn’t want to hide alone he must always be there with friends) this is why police departments shouldn’t be run by district attorneys. Anywho VinCat totally looked into the beast killings from last year (please remind me WHY Cat dated a guy who was a known killer but Vincent was terrible because he was killing beasts for a secret branch of the FBI run by her bio-dad) and though they can’t tie Mo to the killing of a poor carriage driver they might be able to tie him to the dude who tried to kill Heather whom Mo totally killed (I also believe he killed him with a medieval weapon NOT as a beast) and then covered up as the ADA (oh writers you are really making it hard for me to just ignore the first 15 episodes of this season and to focus on the here and now). VinCat go to the crime scene just as the Captain calls Mo to tell him that just before IT locked Cat out of the NYPDs intranet she was looking at a cold case. Mohinder does not look sane as he goes running off to god knows where.

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Tess and Heather meet up for some girl talk. Tess lies to Heather and Heather demands the truth. At least Heather doesn’t want to remain the idiot who fucks up the plan. Tess tells Heather about the soulmates who immediately freaks out, even though Tess asked her not to. So Heather is kind of an ass. [Is Heather a cop? Or at all trained at solving crimes and/or beast issues? She should shut up. -M]

Mohinder calls the brother of the dude who died and tells him off-the-record who killed his brother. I’m guessing Mo didn’t confess so I’m thinking he implicated Vincent –Mohinder worst district attorney ever, Sam Watterson would have SO fired his ass.

At the crime scene Vincent is able to put together that there was a witness and that Ray was killed by a beast (didn’t Mohinder kill some guy with a medieval device like a mace or kill some guy for a mace, I swear Mohinder had a mace in his ultra swanky apartment he shared with Jill –still can’t remember her name). Just as they are leaving the museum they bump into Heather in a back alley (seriously does Heather have the GPS coordinates of Cat’s phone).

HUZZAH! Heather used the find your phone app to find Cat. Cat tells Heather the truth but Heather doesn’t believe her because Heather is kind of an ass. She does manage to let Cat know she is getting married. [This plotline seems so weird and I’m sure will result in the gang going to the wedding which somehow involves beasts and/or Mohinder. -M]

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Mohinder tells Ray’s brother, who looks like a gun runner, that Vincent killed his brother but the brother needs proof. Mo tells him about how V saved Heather from his brother so therefore Heather ties Vincent to Ray. Mo does tell the dude he can’t hurt Heather –this is going to end very badly.

VinCat go to the witnesses house. The poor man is still completely shattered by what he saw. Cat tries to convince him to come forward. I worry about this mans safety, Mo is completely off the rails. As Vincent and Cat are celebrating their small victory while also waiting for Tess to come and take the witness down to the precinct Cat gets a call from Heather who has been kidnapped by Ray’s brother –RUH ROH also Heather is the fucking worst (her hair is still super cute though).

Cat and Vincent realize that Gabe is on to them and that he has set this whole thing up. [Katie figured this out two episodes ago. Way to go, guys. -M] Vincent figures out how to track Heather to the dungeons of all places and Cat goes to the precinct to get Tess for back up. Vincent finds Heather and tries to save her but the brother puts Vincent in the cell with Heather and then sets a bomb to go off in a minute.  Tess and Cat come in and fight off the brother and his henchman, I’m pretty sure they kill them both. Vincent frees Heather and survives the explosion.

Heather and Cat have a heart-to-heart and Heather admits to being in therapy and an ass.

The look on Mohinder’s face as the captain tells him that he is a suspect in a murder is AMAZING.

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Not as amazing as this, nothing will ever be as amazing as this!

VinCat have a heart-to-heart in which we learn that Gabe was positively identified and the witness is in protective custody but that Gabe made bail. They both joke that once a beast always a beast.

At the end of the episode Mohinder kills both the cop protecting the witness and the witness –you know what they say, once a murderer always a murderer. [How about Cat kills HIM, huh? That is my dream. -M]

Next time, kids, Agent Knox returns to put are dynamic duo in witness protection –FUN!

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Photos from CW and gifs from batbnationinnerbeautyandbeast, and gailley007.

4 Comments

  1. I love your commentary in the recap. Great.

  2. Perfect! Thanks for the humor , too!

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