Smart ladies love dumb TV, Beauty and the Beast recap, On Thin Ice


The voice over in its entirety is back —OH JOY!!!


Poor Cat is physical wreck after getting shot (apparently you can’t sleep —who knew?). She and Vincent bond over their war wounds when STUPID Alex calls and interrupts the sweet moment. Vincent DOES decline the call but he and Cat still have an awkward conversation about how he has known Alex his whole life and Cat only a couple of months. Cat ends the conversation with a very passive aggressive “it’s really none of my business.” The poor thing needs to take her mind off her man troubles, but she is on leave until she is healthy and has been cleared by a therapist. [Can Joe take her mind off her man troubles? OWWW! -M]

Then Vincent goes over to Alex’s house —BASTARD! She, of course, has a million pictures of the two of them (CREEPY) and then comes out of the bathroom NAKED (WHORE)!

Job-ordered therapy is AWESOME! Cat has a HOT FUCKING THERAPIST! [Of course she does. -M]  She bitches about the Vincent situation but he points out that she needs to talk about the trauma of being attacked and not her boyfriend issues. If I were her I would just talk to him all the time. He points out that she is emotionally detached and uses her job and high stress situations as crutches to continue denying her pain. As she is leaving the hospital she notices Alex stealing MEDICATION —THIEF!!!

At the warehouse, JT points out how unfair it is that Vincent a RAGE MONSTER has TWO women fighting over him. I too am shocked by this, as Vincent has serious hair issues. Cat interrupts them to tell Vincent about the drugs. Turns out Cat, the ever-awesome detective, did some follow up investigating and the hospital has an ongoing investigation into a series of drug thefts. Vincent looks kind of pissed off but Cat’s all “look you can ignore this all you want but I’m looking out for you if Alex is in trouble VINCENT YOU IDIOT can be in even bigger trouble.” I’m paraphrasing but you get my point.

On Thin Ice

Case of the week is a CEO, Noah Hawkes, who recently got married and on his sky diving honeymoon his wife died because her chute did not open (I am so fucking relieved that Alex isn’t the case of the week two weeks in a row). Evan says that the shoot was tampered with AND that the perpetrator is most likely a LEFTY. Cat begs and then threatens Tess —with manis and pedis with Heather— into letting her help.

Vincent goes to Alex’s where they are awkward because the last time he was there she presented herself to him as a present —classy. Apparently our rage monster declined, I’m hoping out of obligation to Cat. Alex and Vincent have a conversation about their past and their future and it is so BORING. Vincent confronts Alex about the drugs and she admits it. She has being stealing drugs for a free clinic (set up in the back of a thrift store). [Noooo not a thrift store! -M] She takes him there and presents him as a doctor.

Tess interviews Hawkes and Cat secretly interviews the female CFO of Hawkes company. Tess and Cat find out that the couple were madly in love and very connected, they were each other’s everything —vomit. The ladies find out that Hawkes is throwing a party for investors and Tess tells Cat that they are going, because GOD DAMMIT they are young and sexy and need to find AVAILABLE men. Tess is so my favorite, I wish this was a romantic comedy about her and Joe. Also where the fuck is Joe he is MAN CANDY! [This is the first mention of Joe and he isn’t even in the episode. I will not watch this show unless there is more Joe. -M]

On Thin Ice

Evan calls JT because they are working together now to bring down the animal human hybrid (so I guess JT agreed to work with Evan) and he wants JT to be there when he exhumes a body he found that looks like a possible victim. Then a girl comes in, who I guess is dating Evan, and they have sex in the lab instead of going out to eat. WTF show I am confused by this whole thing.

And we are back to Thrift Store Hospital where Vincent and Alex bond over an injured boy with a dislocated shoulder. Alex tries to encourage Vincent to not live in the dark and to join Thrift Store Hospital. Vincent needs to tell that do-gooding bitch that people are out to KILL HIM and he can’t be all out and about with stolen medicine fixing poor kids arms.

Evan and JT in a rape van, why are they in a rape van? Oh they are exhuming a body at a graveyard and need to haul it back to the lab (HAHAHAHAHAH JT cracks a Fright Night joke). Evan asks JT if he thinks the beast actually knows it is only killing bad people. JT asks Evan why he wants to catch the beast if Evan thinks it might be doing good. Evan admits he wants to study it and help it if it wants to go back to normal. JT looks so happy that might have found a person that can help him help Vincent.

Vincent and Alex break into an ice rink because they are exhilarated by their life saving ways at Thrift Store Hospital! She tries to convince Vincent to run away with her to Africa and save people with a mobile health unit. They then kiss but are interrupted by cops. Vincent in the hands of the cops —GREAT!

On Thin Ice

Tess and Cat look good at the party in dresses provided by Heather, but the fun is interrupted when Vincent calls Cat and lets her know that he is being arrested. Cat solves the situation by lying to a fellow cop that Vincent is an informant for her. Cat gives Vincent a “come to Jesus” speech about the risks he is taking and the lives he will hurt if he gets caught by Muirfield. She also tells him that if wants to continue to risk his life she will have to decide whether or not she wants to continue putting herself at risk for him. I have to give the show props for not letting Cat be a pushover to true fucking love.

Tess continues to try and pry information about Hawkes from his CFO at the party. She admits that she once had a crush on him.

Cat is at the firing range but is interrupted by her therapist because she missed a meeting. He accuses Cat of burring herself in her job because she is suffering from PTSD. Cat goes on a rant about her mom and how Vincent doesn’t even get the risks she takes for him so that he can decide to be with someone who doesn’t really know him.

JT and Evan test the sample they pulled from the victim and it is indeed DNA from Vincent. Evan tells JT that with this information he can ask Joe to form a task force to help bring the beast to justice. Poor JT is all but you want to help him but Evan is all dude look around I’m a cop. JT quickly corrupts the sample right in front of Evan —What kind of cop are you now EVAN? And Evan’s girlfriend is a MUIRFIELD agent (oh wait–it was she who corrupted his samples when she fucked him but still he was there so again not a great cop are you Evan).

IN case of the week news, the CFO totally did it because well who else would it be because she is the only person we have seen from Hawkes company. She is also a LEFTY! Apparently she had an affair with Hawkes. [These cases are more obvious than Murder She Wrote! -M] Her story of love and betrayal hits Cat too close to home and she goes to see her hot therapist. He tells Cat to tell Vincent how she feels because it might just be that Vincent is an idiot who doesn’t realize she loves him.

On Thin Ice

She goes to the warehouse where Vincent tries to apologize, but Cat cuts him off to be honest with him that she wants to be with him and that she is willing to fight for him. He doesn’t know if his choice is so clear, Alex is willing to run away to a place without Muirfield (except she doesn’t know anything about RAGE MONSTERS and SHADOWY GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACIES) would Cat be willing to do the same thing. Cat rightly asks Vincent if he isn’t living in a fantasy by not fully disclosing everything to Alex. Cat, this week I beg you to date your hot therapist and give up on Vincent.

See you next week when Vincent goes camping with Alex and is attacked by Muirfield! [I CAN’T WAIT! ps I keep reading Muirfield as Muirglen because I love tomatoes! -M]

Why yes all of the promo photos are from the ice rink debacle thanks CW for NOT being at all helpful!   

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