…and then the plane crashed and everybody died…
Okay just Lexie and Mark died but ARIZONA LOST A LEG! A LEG! Oh the humanity! And so starts Season 9 of the bestest greatest most fantastically amazing show on TV (oh wait that’s Fringe and/or Mad Men), the most guiltiest of pleasures on TV (yes that’s it!).
With the start of the new season I thought I would do a follow up post on Grey’s season 9. Are Mere and Christina still besties? OF COURSE! Is Derek still McDreamy? ABSOLUTELY! Are Bailey and the Chief still the voices of reason, are YOU reading this blog! AND Bailey is having lots of sex with that hottie Jason George (lucky girl). AND Alex was having sex with Mac from Veronica Mars in an on call room at the beginning of last weeks episode! WHAT WOULD WALLACE AND VERONICA SAY??? (Fun fact: I have now seen Tina in her underwear twice this year. Please Tina, you were in Corrina Corrina as a child put your clothes on!)
Episode one is set well after the plane crash and is an entire hour dedicated to the new interns (Smash from FNL and Mac are the only ones I remember) and pulling Mark off life support (where the fuck is Addison). Apparently Mere has become a no nonsense attending (her nickname is Medusa) and Christina is in Minnesota (she does not fit in). It has the surprise reveal of Arizona losing her leg (I kind of don’t buy the way she is acting, I mean Arizona has pluck–she wouldn’t become an emotional wreck over a leg not with today’s prosthesis and her wife being a orthopedic surgeon and with Oscar Pistorius in the Olympics he has NO LEGS…Shonda better clear this shit up during episode 2).
And now episode two which was a flashback episode. A FLASHBACK EPISODE! The Grey’s writers LOVE flashback episodes. This time we’re going to cycle through each plane crash survivor from the time the plane crashed till the beginning of the last episode. It’s kind of confusing this back and forth through time. I also don’t understand why this wasn’t the first episode. Every time they show Mark I’m sad and confused like “wait he’s dead, oh right were doing a weird flashing back/flashing forward episode” (Fun Fact: Bailey totally made a Lost joke to the Chief, I love when the writers remember that Bailey is a nerd). So I too will cycle through each character…FUN!
Derek and Meredith
BORING…Derek’s hand was injured in the crash and he is a surgeon (didn’t we do this with Burke, I miss Burke even though he was played by a homophobe, his character was awesome; just the actor who played him was an ass). Meredith was supposed to go to Harvard but with the crash is all “Seattle is my home”. It is boring and I made toast. [Burke isn’t on this show anymore? When did that happen? Also that toast comment was gold. -M]
Christina Yang and Owen Hunt
Catatonic Yang! NO! I know that Christina has had issues in the past with PTSD but catatonia! This is very upsetting. She is so sad and then the interns stare at her and she throws a vase at them…Fuck Yeah! Then Sandra Oh does what Sandra Oh does and totally acts the shit out of this scene where she tells Owen about what happened after the crash and I am suddenly watching a much better show than I was before. More Sandra Oh, please. [This show should be cancelled so she can join The Good Wife. -M]
Mark, Avery, and April
April leaves to go back to the farm and…oh who gives a shit I just included them so that I could include a picture of Jesse Williams.
This is all about Mark and how he died of a broken heart for REALSIES…WTF??? Why am I even watching this shit? …Oh right, Sandra Oh and Chandra Wilson.
Arizona Robins and Callie Tores
ARGH this story blows so fucking much. I will list them:
- Callie would not be allowed to treat Arizona because she is her wife (thankfully Owen points this out but of course they ignore it cause it’s Seattle Grace Mercy West…worst hospital EVER!)
- Arizona would not be a bitch to the people in Idaho
- Arizona would never be that mean to Alex
- It’s just a fucking leg, you work for a supposedly fantastic hospital (worst hospital EVER!) and you are freaked out about not having a leg…UGH!
- Callie needs to watch the Mary Carillo interview with Oscar Pistorius
- OMG my wife cut off my leg…I WILL NEVER LOVE AGAIN…
And now a letter to Shonda Rhimes
I heart you so much. You are an inspiration for women everywhere. I watched Private Practice until it started making me want to die. I am a devoted fan. I will one day convince Melissa you should be Smart Dame of the Week.
BUT! What are you doing with Arizona and Callie. I mean Meredith would freak out about not having a leg cause she is vapid and fucked up but Arizona would know that it’s better to amputate a leg and get a kick ass prosthetic than to DIE. She has a family!
You should kill everyone off except for Christina, Bailey, and the Chief. I’m thinking freak earthquake they totally happen and the hospital is destroyed and they are the only survivors. Oh I forgot Avery, Avery the hottie would also survive. OR those four would die and we could do Seattle Grace in heaven with Mark and Lexie. Who I miss so much, SERIOUSLY, why did you have to kill the funny people.
Don’t waist Smash and Mac. Next week’s episode seems happier so maybe I will forgive you for the whole Arizona is a completely different person. I mean come on it’s the one thing you all do well is making sure your characters act the way they would act and not to advance plot. I mean I guess Arizona wouldn’t rise above losing a leg but I just don’t see it. And she would have been kind to Alex and not hurtful.
[I think Shonda can be a Smart Dame soon because of the Awkward Black Girl show she is developing. I am into that. Is Avery Jesse Williams? Because he should totally live due to his hotness. Or maybe join Sandra on The Good Wife. Is Massimo from The Wedding Planner still on this show?-M]
* I apologize for the prevalence of all caps, exclamation points, and the swearing, so so much swearing. I’m very passionate about my Grey’s.
**Tina Majorino’s photo comes from her IMDB profile. Promo art for season 9 comes from Grey’s official website.