Smart ladies love dumb TV, X Factor UK live show two

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Another week of X Factor UK live shows over, another from Gary’s team voted out after a deadlock judge’s vote. Bye Melanie, I will not miss your terrible, outdated song choices.

I’m going to do a little something different this week. Embedding all the code for those performances every week was so fucking boring. Who doesn’t love lists?

Best Hair


Ella Henderson’s big beautiful beehive!

Best Boots


Union J. Like Dermot, I was a fan of their winter gear. The kid on the left was wearing a really cool coat with leather 3/4-length sleeves.

Best Makeover


MK1 turning Louis Walsh into “Uncle Louis.”

Best Makeup


Charlie from MK1. She is the cutest too!

Worst Makeup


Kye Sones. Also, worst mashup–“Love the Way you Lie” + Dido’s “Thank You.” GAG.

Most Awkward


Lucy Spraggan, in a fug winter beanie, checking out her dancers during her mediocre performance of  “Gold Digger” and then Nicole calling her out on it later!

I cried when


Jade Ellis started talking about Amy Winehouse. What is wrong with me?

Least Memorable

District 3 doing “I Swear.” I don’t remember any of it, and neither did the UK, since they were in the bottom two.

WTF


I think this outfit got Melanie Masson eliminated. That and all the screaming.

Weirdest


Rylan had Karl Lagerfelds and Anna Wintours lining the stage and “fashion pandas” dancing with him. This would never air on American TV. I LOVE IT.

You should probably see this whole thing for yourself. I am going to watch it ten times a day. It is genius.

No, I didn’t forget

Jahmene, James and Christopher, they were just SO BORING and don’t deserve a mention. Maybe next time, fellas, you can make it on my prestigious list that I’ve never made before and no one reads!

My Favorite Performance

Ella doing Minnie Ripperton’s “Loving You,” one of my favorite songs to sing and torment my husband with, as she turned it into a modern classic. Plus her dress is ah-mah-zing (one week until Happy Endings returns, folks!!!).


Photo sources: everything is screencapped by me except Ella & Charlie

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