Smart ladies love dumb TV, X Factor UK recap live show five

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While I think Stevi Ritchie is a nice chap, there is no reason he should still be on The X Factor while Paul Akister, he of the lovely R&B voice, was sent home. Stevi hasn’t even been in the bottom two. I wouldn’t rush to call this show Fix Factor just yet, but everything about the remaining contestants is puzzling, mostly because Simon has all FOUR left. Louis has 2, and the women now each have one.

Mel B was totally shocked to lose another boy:

And One Direction performed Sunday, giving us this amazing gif:

Hilarious looks Stereo Kicks had on their faces when there was an imposter on the stage

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X Factor UK 5 35

X Factor UK 5 36

 

Cutest family members

ALL OF THEM.

Mel B's girls!

Mel B’s girls!

Andrea's grandmother, boosting his self esteem.

Andrea’s grandmother, boosting his self esteem.

Lauren's mom's dog.

Lauren’s mom’s dog.

Ben and his brother were in a band together and his brother got tinnitus and had to quit.

Ben and his brother were in a band together and his brother got tinnitus and had to quit.

Jake Sims' sister.

Jake Sims’ sister.

Other amazing guests

Adam Lambert tried to help Paul be more Freddie-like.

Adam Lambert tried to help Paul be more Freddie-like.

He's just so supportive! Via.

He’s just so supportive! Via.

Fleur was in a dance crew!

Fleur was in a dance crew!

Stevi's friends from the call center where he worked.

Stevi’s friends from the call center where he worked.

Worst fashion trend

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X Factor UK 5 18

Random black shirts being tied around the waists of the girls from Only the Young.

Why being Andrea would not be so bad

He gets so much food!

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X Factor UK 5 47

X Factor UK 5 49

Why Stereo Kicks needs to learn to do something with their hands

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X Factor UK 5 38

X Factor UK 5 40

X Factor UK 5 41

X Factor UK 5 42

SO. MUCH. POINTING.

Worst editing

The theme was changed from “disco” to “Queen vs Michael Jackson” last weekend but this bit with Louis and Only the Young was clearly filmed before then.

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X Factor UK 5 15

Worst guest

THIS GUY. Not you, Sara from Girls Aloud.

THIS GUY. Not you, Sarah from Girls Aloud.

Most meta performance

Jay James started Queen’s “Show Must Go On” from behind the stage.

X Factor UK 5 07

X Factor UK 5 08

It ALMOST felt like SNL.

The show must really go on, because he has to go perform in front of those people.

The show must really go on, because he has to go perform in front of those people.

Best/worst person in the world

Could it be anyone but Stevi?

Working the X Factor social media. Via.

Working with the X Factor social media team. Via.

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X Factor UK 5 27

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CREEPY.

CREEPY.

Back at the call center!

Back at the call center!

Also, THIS:

Favorite performance

This theme is horrible and I don’t want to hear any of these songs again; however, Fleur East can SANG.

Probable winner

I’ve changed my mind and I now think it’s Ben Haenow because everyone on the internet loves him and he is part of Simon’s unstoppable team.

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